Unconditional LOVE - What is it ?

Unconditional Love - very common words  we come across nowadays.
What it could really mean?

Popular meaning is, not to put loyalty conditions in a love relationship.
But we got to go beyond that and take a broader spectrum of love including romantic love to understand what unconditional love could really mean.

Beside romantic love, we have mother's love, brother's love, friend's love and many many more.
There are as many love as there are relationships.
We can easily see,
In all these relationships, love is conditional because relationships are conditional.
Mothers'love is only for her child and so are brother', friends, partner's and so on.
In our empirical life we can't find any love which is not based on a condition. 
If we remove the conditions, love becomes abstract, an idea without any concrete reality.
Or, is it the other way around.
That is,
have we narrowed down the universal unconditional love to suit our empirical conditions?
If we take the sunlight as a metaphor for love.
We can equate sun light in the open space to unconditional love.
 Inside a room, sunlight enters only in the shape of the windows -restricted and or tainted.
It is qualitatively altered.
In the same way, 
when unconditional love is  manifested through our relationships,
it is narrowed down and attain different expressions - romance,care, affection, empathy,
regard, respect and so on.
All these feelings and expressions are limited versions of that unconditional universal love.
Its original nature is said to be compassion towards all.

So, the love we have is unconditional but limited by our empirical conditions.
If we can remove the conditions, then it will manifest itself in full glory.
Our conditions are ego centric - for its welfare and protection.
So, as long as we have this ego centric view of life,
unconditional love will remain an ideal or an idea.
If one can transcend ego or personal consciousness and there by transcending the conditions,
that universal unconditional love may come into being.
It is not making the windows bigger but walking out of the room into the open.

Those, who attained it say,
it is not only compassion but also intelligence that reveals cosmic purpose and order.

  

Why sex is a problem in the society?

Why sex is a problem in the society?

When this question was put to J.Krihnamurti-

His reply went like this,

'Why sex... 

if you think about eating all day long, it will become a problem...

problem is not the act but the thoughts about it".

In that case, why any one think about it all the time?

That too,

it is the civilized who have thoughts and think about it a lot, 

not the so called uncivilized.

So, problem might have something to do with the process of civilization.

Science says, propagation of species is the order of life forms in nature, 

And Self Preservation and Procreation are two mechanisms through 

which it is accomplished.

That makes eating and having sex as base needs of life forms.

Being so, 

evolution provided incentive of Pleasure for performing those acts 

to make life forms stay the course of propagation .

It is called as Pleasure Principle by the experts.

So we find sense of pleasure in eating and in sexual act.

When humans become civilized, secured and gained knowledge.

Their actions are not solely governed by instincts but vastly influenced by their thought process.

In the process, 

pleasure and its associated purpose is separated and now these acts are done for pleasure alone.

This is quite obvious,

We no longer eat for hunger alone but for appetite and to satisfy our cultivated taste.

We no longer have sex to have children (now that can be done in a lab) but for pleasure alone.

So sex, devoid of its original purpose have invented apparent purposes,

To escape stress,  build bond , show dominance, barter it for benefits and so on.

So, Pursuit of pleasure have become primary thought in modern life.

Then, one can’t help thinking about it a lot and disturbed by that as well.

Disturbed because, it is an instinctive urge and can easily override other norms.

Generally speaking, anything out of place or out of proportion will create problems.

As Jean Paul Sartre says in a different context   

A girl wearing a swim suit is graceful in a beach but obscene in a park.

So,

‘Out of proportion’ eating have created health issues and 

‘Out of place’ sex have created relationship issues.

Then,

We can’t revert to our original innocence or put the genie back in the bottle 

and attain godly grace.

That may be for the enlightened ones.

Anyway, 

beside biological perspective, sex has psychological (LG) and spiritual (Bridal Mysticism) perspectives.

That is another topic.

But , being aware , one can avoid being brazen and insensitive 

and become prudent and wise.

That would make at least pursuit of pleasure a graceful act.

"What is happening to you is what you think is happening to you" - is it so?

“What is happening to you is 

what you think is happening to you “ - is that true ?

This is not about what happens physically but  what happens to us psychologically over an event.

how we think ?

We think or interpret events only in terms of our opinions.

For example, if i have a good opinion about a particular political party .

Then, Its electoral win can bring joy to me.

But, for some reason if my opinion has changed,  then the same event can bring sadness.

The event remaining the same, 

What is ‘happening’ to me changes according to my thinking.

In other words what is happening to me is what i think is happening to me.

This is one simple situation.

Taking a bigger picture or abstract,

All events are interpreted only by our belief system.

Belief system is a complex net work of opinions,prejudices about people, race,religion, culture etc.

In short , about everything around us.

Some beliefs are cultivated consciously like affiliation to a political party.

And, some are at unconscious level like religious, racial, cultural ideas derived from family/society. 

We (can) think and interpret events only in terms of our belief system.

They only qualify any ‘happening' as good, bad or as  desirable , undesirable.

But,

They are all based on belief only, in terms of which we think.

So, whatever happens to us psychologically, ‘Happens’ only because we think so .

The event may be objective but psychological happening is subjective and solely 

depends on one’s belief system.

There is no objective kind of ‘happening’ psychologically.

Change in our beliefs /thoughts will change what is happening to us.

For some, 

change in belief/idea/thought can even transform life itself.

(Change is not tweaking or calibrating a thought, that may work in physical sphere

but not in the psychological sphere. That is, one can be semi-skilled but not semi-honest.)

So, it is true that,

What is happening to us is only what we think is happening to us.

Putting it in other words -

We only decide what happens to us psychologically by choosing  our thoughts and affiliations.

So, in that sense ,

we are the maker our own destiny at least in our psychological sphere.